BEST DIVORCE LETTER EVER
Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter totell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years& I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. … Yourboss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the laststraw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut,had cooked your favourite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of yoursoaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want $ex or anythingthat connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or youdon’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginiatogether! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & Ihave been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from whatyou’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constantwhining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got ahaircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just likea girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say somethingnice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favourite meal, you must havegotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 pricetag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister hadjust borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you& felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 milliondollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got homeyou were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have thefulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wroteensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. Ihope that’s not a problem.
| 
| 
| 
|
العربية
Deutsch
Español
Français
한국어
|
[Copy link]
Post time: 6-6-2018 10:02:10